my soap journal

Scripture:

Hebrews 13:4 “Give honor to marriage, and remain faithful to one another in marriage. God will surely judge people who are immoral and those who commit adultery.”

Observation:

Hm, well the kids are up, which I guess is fine since I didn’t have a whole lot of thoughts; I  just liked the encouragement to “Give honor to marriage.”

Prayer:

Lord – help me do this!

Scripture:

Hebrews 12:1 “Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us.”

Observation:

I don’t have a great handle on this verse. There are lots of great reasons to “strip off every weight that slows us down,” it’s interesting that, here, we ought to because of the crowd of witnesses. Initially I thought “witnesses” referred to the church body – which confused me. The reasoning is just weird. Then I thought maybe “witnesses” referred to non-believers; that makes sense. If we really consider that we’re representatives of Jesus to an unbelieving world, then there is good reason to shed everything that would point to anything other than Christ. Then, reading through other versions, it’s clear that my first impression of the meaning was correct. So, back to square one?

I’m reminded of Jeff. He ran track in grade school and we went to his meets. Whenever he saw us throughout the race, he would speed up. He sped up for his family; the people who honestly loved him no matter how fast he ran or what place he ended up in. But he sped up anyway … kinda like this verse suggests.

Application:

Whether I fully understand this particular reason for doing so, I still want to strip off every weight, especially sin. It is interesting that the two aren’t necessarily the same. Like we talked about yesterday in our staff meeting. Having stuff isn’t sin – but it is weight that slows us down.

Prayer:

Lord, help me identify the extra weight in my life, especially the sin that so easily trips me up.

Scripture:

Isaiah 16:5 “David’s throne will be established by love. From that throne a faithful king will reign, one who always does what is just and right.”

Observation:

It’s easy to look back at verses like this and wonder what made people think that Christ would come as a powerful political ruler. I’m sure they had verses they would’ve pointed to which supported their views… I wonder what they were?

Application:

“Established by love.” I like this phrase – it’s how I want to “do business.” Also, I want to be sure that I am letting scripture inform my views rather than using scripture to support my views. I think this is a delicate practice.

Prayer:

Thank you for coming in love!

Scripture:

Isaiah 11:1-4 “A shoot will come up from the stump of Jesse; from his roots a Branch will bear fruit. The Spirit of the LORD will rest on him—
the Spirit of wisdom and of understanding,
the Spirit of counsel and of power,
the Spirit of knowledge and of the fear of the LORD -
and he will delight in the fear of the LORD. He will not judge by what he sees with his eyes, or decide by what he hears with his ears; but with righteousness he will judge the needy, with justice he will give decisions for the poor of the earth. He will strike the earth with the rod of his mouth; with the breath of his lips he will slay the wicked. Righteousness will be his belt and faithfulness the sash around his waist.”

Observation:

Today’s reading is heavily focused on Christ. As I read through this passage, I couldn’t help but think “I want to be like that!” It’s so good to have a Lord – a leader, a savior, an example – whom I want to be like.

Prayer:

I can’t help but think of the old song “Make me like you, O Lord.” And so that is my prayer; use my life – my surroundings, my circumstances, my relationships – to form me into a Christlike person.

Scripture:

Hebrews 6:11-12 “Our great desire is that you will keep on loving others as long as life lasts, in order to make certain that what you hope for will come true. Then you will not become spiritually dull and indifferent. Instead, you will follow the example of those who are going to inherit God’s promises because of their faith and endurance.”

Observation:

The line that initially stood out to me is “Then you will not become spiritually dull and indifferent;” I don’t want to be spiritually dull or indifferent. How do I make sure I don’t? Keep loving others. I love it – simple. It’s interesting … I’m reminded of occasions where I have felt or others have said something like “I’m not getting fed” or “I’m not growing.” During those times, have I been truly investing in – loving – others? If my spiritual walk is feeling listless, I probably ought to set aside some time to do some extra loving on people.

Application:

I don’t feel like I’m dull or indifferent right now, but I can also say I don’t have any time in my life when I just serve other people.  I guess some of this happens at work? Even though I’m not pastoring any specific group of people, I do get opportunities to just love on others. I should focus more on these relationships … really the very start of my job is to be serving our staff – am I doing that as best I can? Probably not … I’d like to work this into my planning and goal-setting, but what does this look like?

Prayer:

Lord, thank you for letting me be part of the Life Center staff – it is truly a blessing. I get to work with great people doing a job I really enjoy … and at the heart of it is a call to love others which your Word promises will keep me spiritually engaged. I am truly blessed.

Scripture:

Psalm 102:4 “My heart is sick, withered like grass, and I have lost my appetite.”

Observation:

The reasons this verse stood out to me are completely out of context, but it is what remained in my mind.

I made a work decision, which really wasn’t a decision at all except to delay a process until more people were able to come to the table. Initially I felt peace about it – true peace. Like God would work through this future meeting to bring about his desired end. Yet I am still consumed by the situation. My heart is sick, withered like grass. I suppose I’ve only given half of it to God. The “official” part I’ve handed over, but the informal, the relational portion … clearly not surrendered. I don’t even know how to surrender it. I’m not in a place to forgive; there’s no sin. The situation is difficult because a relationship is being leveraged against work, so now the work situation is affecting the relationship. Though not a sin, the problem is because work is entangled in relationship; I feel like what I need to do is compartmentalize the situation … but I’m not even sure that’s the right thing. I’ve not been wronged per se, but I have been placed in a very awkward situation. A situation where there will be fallout. Whatever decision is made at the end, though all involved will be part of the process, I do not think all will walk away happy. And the ramifications of either decision will affect me. I share Paul’s thoughts in Romans 7 – O what a miserable person I am! Who will free me from this life of sin and death? Fortunately he doesn’t let the question hang: Thank God, the answer is in Jesus Christ, our Lord.

Prayer:

Lord, Jesus Christ, my honest prayer is to be removed from the situation entirely. I don’t think that’s necessarily what you want though, so  please help me surrender whatever I need to so this stops clouding every thought.

Scripture:

Hosea 11:8-9 “Oh, how can I give you up, Israel? How can I let you go? How can I destroy you like Admah or demolish you like Zeboiim? My heart is torn within me, and my compassion overflows. No, I will not unleash my fierce anger. I will not completely destroy Israel, for I am God and not a mere mortal. I am the Holy One living among you, and I will not come to destroy.”

Observation:

Passages like this let me know that I actually am made in God’s image. It can be easy to forget when I am so fallible and he is so perfect. But even God feels this … I hesitate to call it temptation … struggles with his course of action against Israel. This situation reminds me of parenthood and watching my children repeatedly do something I’ve asked them to stop.

Application:

Because I am like God in my struggle, I can be like him in grace and mercy. I can let these attributes and practices outweigh my other emotions.

Prayer:

Lord, thank you for your example, for the gift of your likeness – help me be more like you.